February Days

The rest of the month of February flew by with some highs and some lows....

A highlight was going to the Nauvoo temple with my friend Tanise for her first time.  It was a very snowy day, but such a beautiful experience...and to be surrounded by friends we love made it even more special.

The temple is a place of peace and perspective....it is a place where we can be reminded about why we are truly here and what needs to be important in our lives...this day was one of my very favorite days.

We had more snow....and more snow days!!!

We got a ton of snow one day, so the kids built a fort in the backyard...then the next day it was really warm so they took me outside to take some pictures.  Crazy weather this year!

We tried to find things to do around the house to keep everyone entertained.

      A cute puppet show:

     Playing with balloons:

     Making blanket forts:

     Playing pirates:

    Playing with Little People toys:

Luke turned 10 months old and started crawling.  He is loving being able to cruise around the house.  He puts everything in his mouth, so we have had to be diligent at picking things up!  It is a big adjustment.  Good thing he is oh so cute!

We are all experiencing a bit of cabin fever...it makes getting a long a little bit tricky.

Found this note Regan had typed up...things she is supposed to work on for tumbling.

More basketball and indoor soccer!  Jordan did a great job playing goalie for her team, and she also learned a lot playing basketball this season.  Ashton's soccer team improved a ton over the season...and she did really well...even scored 2 goals last weekend!  Her basketball team has also improved and won the Midwest Invitational tournament yesterday.  (Hard to get good pictures of indoor sports!)

Ashton has been working really hard on her violin solo.  Last weekend was solo festivel, and she was so nervous.  But her practice paid off, and she performed so well!  I got to accompany for her which I really enjoyed.  She left the judge speechless (in a good way!) and walked away with a gold ribbon and a ranking of 1+ (very hard to achieve that ranking!)

We all got hit with a bad stomach bug...it was terrible as it swept through the family one by one.  When Regan and I were sick, Jordan made this sweet sign and hung it in the bathroom for us.  It made things a little better!  I am not good at dealing with sickness....so grateful we are all healthy most of the time!

I love being home with these 2 boys...boys are so much fun and lots less drama.  Our days are happy and calm.  Can't believe that next year Cole will be in kindergarten...trying to hold on to these days of having these 2 brothers home together.

Love this winter sunshine streaming through the windows...hoping that March is full of sunshine!

Happy Birthday and Happy Valentine's Day!

Dear Mama, 

Happy Birthday and Happy Valentine's Day!  I hope you know how much I still think about you, remember you and try to be like you.  As I have shared memories and stories about you this month, it has been so healing for my soul.  I have loved thinking back on my time with you...remembering all the good times and even the hard things.  Going through old pictures has been such a treat and has helped me think about so many wonderful moments.  It has been amazing to hear from your friends and family as they have read these memories...you truly influenced and blessed so many people in your time here on this earth.  And guess what?  The cool thing that I have been reminded about is that your influence continues!  In so many aspects of my life, I am doing the things that you taught me to do or the things that I watched you do.  You are alive in your children, in your children's children, in your extended family and in your friends!  

I love this picture of you looking at me in 1976

Your grand-daughter Jordan took this sweet picture of Luke and me the other day.  I love that you and I have very similar expressions on our faces!

Today has been a very happy Valentine's Day!  Each of your grandchildren posed for a quick picture before they left for school.  They all left at different times, so a group picture wasn't an option!

Here is Ashton off to 6th grade...she had orchestra before school and swimming after school, so her arms were full.  She loved the Swedish Fish valentine I left for her on the table this morning.

And Jordan headed off bright and early in the snow to catch a ride to origami club.  She doesn't really like giving out cheesy Valentine's but was happy with her ruler cards and teacher pencils we made out of rolos. 

Regan worked so hard on her butterfly cards.  She had a great time at her Girl Scouts yesterday and was so excited for school today.

Cole loved his tanker truck box we made together.  Seeing his excitement over it was contagious and fun.

And little Luke...his very first Valentine's Day...and we love him so much!

My sweet Valentine surprised me by taking the day off and arranging a babysitter.  I couldn't have asked for anything better.  We had lunch together and went shopping.  I love this man so much.  Mama, you would love him too.  He would make you laugh, just as he makes me laugh everyday.

Of course, I thought about the rest of the family today too.  You would be so proud of all of them.  They are amazing in every way.

Thank you, thank you, thank you for all that you have given me!  I cannot wait until we can once again be together.  Happy Birthday Valentine Angel!!!!

Love, Your Daughter Jamie

Memories for February: She Created a Home!

We are in full Valentine's Day preparation mode here...and yes, it is the night before!  Somehow, it kind of snuck up on us.  We had lofty plans for homemade things this year...last year it was all I could do to get my very pregnant self to survive the day.  So this year, we tried to make up for it...pictures to come tomorrow...not all went as planned but everyone has gone to bed relatively happy, so I count that as a success!

For today's memory, I wanted to share the memories I have of my mom "creating a home."  When I was in college, I had some wonderful friends who would come and stay at my house during breaks or long weekends.  I remember one close friend always telling me that she "loved the way my house felt."  I have thought often about her comment....because I too "loved the way my house felt".

I am sure there were many reasons for this feeling, but I am thinking specifically tonight of all that my mom did to cultivate a feeling of peace, happiness and joy in our home.  Some of the things that she did seemed so simple at the time and yet they really made an impact.

My mom often had beautiful music playing in the background...on Sundays it was always church music, on other days it was jazz or FM100...to this day when I hear some of those old classic songs (think Bee Gees and Chicago), I am just right back home again.

My mom cooked delicious simple meals...and we ALWAYS ate dinner together around the table.  If someone was at a practice or something, we went ahead without them and left their plate there until they came home and ate.  Some of my favorite dishes included her trademark spaghetti (which I still make today!), lasagna, and chicken noodle soup.  I loved coming home after a long day and smelling whatever it was that she had cooking.

(Katy eating Mom's famous spaghetti)

My mom was almost always home when we got home from school...and I loved that.  She usually had a snack for us, and it was such a good opportunity to just chat for a few minutes.

(The first day of school in 1982)

My mom would straighten up the house before my dad came home from work...that may sound a little strange to some...it certainly was not because he expected or demanded it....my mom just knew that it was more pleasant to come home when you didn't have to trip over things as you came in the door.

My mom kept our home neat and clean...it's funny because I can remember her saying that she didn't feel like she was very good at "keeping house"...and yet I don't ever remember the house being really messy...I'm sure it was at times but she seemed to have a really good system for keeping it all functioning...wish she could give me some pointers.

 (Above, my sister Melissa helps with vacuuming.  Below, Mel and me in the clothes hamper)

My mom was quick to forgive...she was not perfect and she was sometimes a bit of a "yeller" when it came to disciplining...she and I could especially lock horns over certain issues...but my mom was always quick to apologize and move on...she didn't pout or let things fester...we would have it out and then it would be over and she would smother me with hugs and kisses.

She certainly understood that it is the mother who sets the mood for the home...some days I wish that wasn't the case...some days I just want to be honory and short-tempered and snappy and lazy....but then I think of my mom and I think of our house...and I put myself ahead 20 years or so...and I can only hope that one of my children looking back might say, "I loved the way my house felt."

Memories for February: She Celebrated Others!

It has been such a hectic day...and I really need to go to bed...but a short memory for tonight.

My mom had the unique and rare gift of being able to celebrate others and their accomplishments.  She was genuinely happy for others when something good happened to them.  She was so excited to share in others successes, whether they were big or small...I can remember her expressing this on so many occasions.

As I got older, this became even more intriguing and impressive to me.  She was always asking her friends about their children's accomplishments...and she was thrilled when they won championship games or passed a test or got a new job. She sincerely wanted to hear about others achievements...and she genuinely listened.  It didn't matter what the achievement was...whether you got new carpet in your bedroom or added a new flower bed to your front yard...my mom would be excited and happy for you.  What a rare and beautiful talent she possessed.

I remember just a few months after my mom passed away, I was in my first year of teaching fourth grade.  I received a phone call in the middle of the day informing me that I had won a prestigious teaching award.  Of course, I was ecstatic and flattered...but I sat in the teacher's workroom and held the telephone receiver (before cell phones!) in my hands long after the caller had hung up...and the tears flowed down my face.  I couldn't imagine how I could even be happy for this accomplishment when my greatest cheerleader in the world wasn't around to acknowledge my success.  Of course, I was surrounded by such a great support system...but I missed that one person because I could just picture how her face and her eyes would light up, and she would be so so so happy for me.

It is a very difficult skill to cultivate...the ability to be completely happy for the good that happens to someone else, without a thought for desires for your own situation.  It is something I am constantly working on...and something I am trying to teach my children.  I am so glad I got to experience first hand what it is to have someone truly celebrate others.

(My brother and I with Mom on her Valentine's birthday in 1982)

Memories for February: She Endured!

My mom struggled with health challenges her whole life.  For many, many years, doctors struggled to really know how to treat her condition.  Eventually, she was diagnosed with Crohn's disease, an inflammatory disease of the intestines.

When I was young, I can remember waking up in the morning many times and finding my dad sitting alone on the couch.  Then he would tell us that he had to take Mom to the hospital, and she was going to be there for a while...and then he would manage to continue to run the household in a way that is just remarkable to me.

I  remember being really scared when Mom would be in the hospital, but she always got better and came home, and in my innocent mind, it was just the way things were...but now I am older and have a family of my own.  I have 5 children counting on me every day.  I can't even imagine what my parents must have gone through every single time my mom got sick.  I have since learned that my mom "knocked on death's door" many times...and there were several times when doctors didn't know if she would live.   Our family counts it as one of our greatest blessings that my mom was able to live to raise her children...she passed away just weeks after my youngest sister's high school graduation.  Of course, we wanted her for much, much longer...but we are so grateful for the time we had.

The thing that I want to remember is that my mom endured her situation with such grace and with such a positive outlook.  I never remember her really complaining about not feeling well...but I know a lot of the time, she probably didn't.  If she did mention her health, she quickly moved off of the subject and didn't dwell on it.  She was not a complainer.  She never talked about it not being fair.  And she always just seemed so happy to be alive and to be able to experience life.  Maybe it was because she had had so many close brushes, but she just had such a unique ability to be able to focus on what was truly important to her...the Gospel of Jesus Christ, her family, her friends.

When my youngest sister, Katy, was almost 4 months old, my mom got very sick and was in the hospital.  I was only 5, but I can vividly remember my Grandma Betty and Grandma Thelma rushing up from Helper to take care of us 4 little ones.  My mom had always breast feed and baby Kate was not going to have it any other way...no matter the challenges.  It was the middle of winter, but at feeding time, my Grandmas would wrap Katy in her red "Sue Beck blanket" (Sue was a dear friend who gave her the blanket) and take the baby over to the hospital so my mom could feed her.  Now that takes some commitment and endurance.  In my mom's journals, she talks about how overwhelmingly grateful she was to still be able to feed her baby.  That kind of example of sacrifice just blows me away.

 Great Grandma Thelma stayed on after Mom came home to help out with everything.  She ran a tight ship and everything ran rather efficiently!

 I wish I would have been more understanding towards my mom when she wasn't feeling well.  I like to think that she has forgiven me for my lack of compassion that I sometimes showed towards her, especially as a teenager!

At one point today, one of my children was crying because she couldn't find her gymnastics bag, another needed to be taken to softball practice, another picked up from swimming....yet another child was throwing a fit on the floor because he couldn't have a piece of candy...and I was precariously balancing the fussy, teething baby on the counter while I tried to make dinner.  I could feel my frustration level rising...but then I thought about my mom.  Most of the time I feel pretty great physically...and I still struggle to get through the day...a lot of the time, my mom didn't feel well at all and yet she endured.  I took a deep breath, finished making the dinner, assured one child we would find the bag, rescued fit throwing child from the floor with promises of candy after dinner, saw hubby and child off to softball and loaded everyone in the car to pick up child from swimming.  And I felt so thankful for my health, my strength and for the example I never forget of someone who truly endured.